8 more days away.

Time flies. 8 more days to go and i will be on the flight yet i haven't got my visa. Phew. Mix feeling

Don't ever dare to think, what if, just what if i didn't get it? Its like someone just prick on my bubble and i got nothing left.

Can't sleep well every night. Woke up every morning to check the status of my visa application and i hate this life. Waiting is torturing.

I used to hope that i can just become a pup, eat, sleep and play is their life without any trouble but i realize that its not what i actually think.

The waiting part is the most torturing one. they have to be patient and wait for us to give them the food, wait for us to come back from work and play with them. somehow i feel so sad when my dog spend whole day waiting in front of the window expecting something. What they can do on their own is just to sleep and wait.

I'm glad that people around me started to plan for their future. How about me ? No idea.

Hope that i can utilize the following year to sort it out what i really want. Shall see.

Bye.M

Courage

Alright. I have no idea where to start of but anyway some random thoughts just strike and ya, that's why i am here.
Its had been so long i never bother about the existence of this blog and perhaps life has been so smooth uh. I assumed.

Anyway, lets get into the topic.

Throw back to those primary school days, i used to remember my vision of that time is just being able to graduate from a university. That's all, simple enough. uhm ya, quite short sighted huh. I followed every step that could be taken and make sure that i am in the right track. No matter how rebellious i am, i always kept that in mind and keep going.

I done my foundation year and its a fascinating one. I experienced so many different things and i met kinds of people. one day out of a sudden i have this thought that is this all that i want ? Is it just to graduate from a local uni and get myself a job out there and live with an ordinary life? Nah, its not what i want. I want it more. So i decided to have a transfer.

Its only one month away to my dreams. I always aim for this and now i am really going to get that. But at the meantime something is holding me back, i started to think twice is this really what i want ? I don't know. I convinced myself the sacrifice that i had made today or even the past would be worthwhile, the benefit would definitely offset the price that i paid. But i need more courage.

Fear is like darkness, is a negativity. Darkness does not exist. We can neither bring it nor throw it. If we want to do something with darkness, we must have to do something with the light because that is the only thing that has an existence can be relate to. Put the light off and the darkness is there. But you are doing only with the light not the darkness.

I am blogging this because i need more positive energy to keep me going. All those negative thoughts and the apprehension me is not gonna ruined this. At least not at this moment.